Oh Boy

I don't even want to think about the future. You know how people all have this exciting event in their future, well I'm tired of living like that. I want to live day to day, making sure that each day has some brightness to it. It could always be worse. I want to live moment to moment, not event to event. Life should not be all about highs and lows, even though it is, but everything happens for a reason. There is always darkness before the storm clears. I shouldn't want to die, people shouldn't want to die. People drink and smoke and do drugs and just do reckless things, in the hope that it will lead to their demise. I understand things are bad, but there is always a person out there that has it worse off than you. And instead of trying to end life, we should embrace it and try to make the most of every situation.

"Hope for the best, prepare for the worst"

Therefore, I am going to try to no longer be sad or upset or worried. Key word try. I want to live day to day as if it were my last, and never look back. I want to have no regrets anymore. I know all of this is bullshit, but we'll see, lol. I want to live life to the fullest and take every situation with a level head and a strong heart. I just might try to get off of my anti-depressants. You say that I don't need them and that I should be happy. How can someone tell you to not be depressed when they're the reason you are depressed. Their the reason that you've wanted to die for so long, They know their the reason, but you don't want to point out the obvious, because you will only be told to shut up and that your wrong. Oh boy, now i'm just being nostalgic, without the desire to return to those damn memories. I feel so alive and stable for once, lets see how long this lasts.